Excited but….

Excited for my trip tomorrow but I’m feeling sick. I guess I wanna say
Hi, I have an autoimmune disease and it sucks. It sucks for your own body to turn on itself and self destruct. When I was younger it was harder to grasp that. I would think – hey – if my body doesn’t even want to live, why should I? It really took a toll on my already strained mental health. Depression led to more frequent suicidal ideation. It took a while for me to really accept my chronic condition and to find ways to cope with it. If you or someone you know out there is struggling – with anything really – be kind and patient. We can get through this πŸ™‚   

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I’m Back: The Clinging Grasp of Depression

It has been about four months since I’ve last updated. The last time I made a post it was about my decision to go gluten and soy-free. Up until now I would say I have been successful at cutting gluten out of my diet. Soy on the other hand, I have found to be a lot more challenging. Mainly because I tend to love Asian food which often contains varying soy products and second, because many things contain soy in one form or the other. However, I have done my best to reduce my soy intake by a significant margin.Β  Continue reading

Life With Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis: The Fear

Will I be able to accomplish my goals and reach my dreams?

The doubt, the fear – it lingers.

As positive as I like to keep my head-space – there is always that creeping thought that I will not be able to accomplish anything. My illness will win the fight. Or at least weaken me to the point that my dreams slip from my fingers.

I have this random white patch that is becoming more and more apparent as the weeks go by and I can’t help but think it might be early vitiligo. A lot of sources I’ve read pointed out a connection between vitiligo and thyroid disorders as well as autoimmune disorders. I really wonder what it is. I need to get it checked out before my anxiety kicks in.

Since Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis is an autoimmune disease – there is an even greater chance for me to get other autoimmune diseases. Autoimmune diseases such as Type 1 diabetes, Rheumatoid arthritis, lupus, and MS, to name a few.

While I don’t think about it a lot, it haunts me.

It’s taking me so long to adjust and wrap my head around just one, I don’t even know what I’d do if more were to come my way. I couldn’t even handle an all-nighter the other day. I ended up getting a fever, burning body aches that left me screaming in my sleep for my mother and an extra swollen thyroid.

But I want to be a doctor, I really do.

So, I’m going to suck it up, take care of myself and continue to march on.